( there's a lot in there that he could touch on. the panic response, the need to keep people at a distance. jason tried that, too, until he realized he sucked at it, got attached to too many people, and lost nearly all of them. he could throw tony off, say fuck him, pack up his bags, and move his and dick's shit out. they'll be fine, they're always fine.
it's what he usually does, when someone throws feelings at him. because attachment is hard. harder still when something goes wrong, everything gets fucked up, and jason's left heartbroken wondering why the fuck he keeps putting himself through this shit. losing roy was a heartbreak, but it was one he pushed for himself. losing artemis and bizzaro was another. losing bruce and the rest of his family at the same time was--enough to break a guy. losing kovacs was oddly hard, because jason's pretty sure their whole thing was just bruising each other up for fun, but he'd gotten attached to that. losing cain was harder. there were so many he watched disappear one by one, up until the point he disappeared and ended up here. he's lost cass and steph already, and he'd just readjusted to steph's wit fucking him up. they'd laughed over putting a tramp stamp on jason, bullied tim.
because jason's an idiot who has forgotten how to keep it all in. to keep to himself, some asshat made him realize that pushing through in dark corners all by himself was fucking him over more than it was helping. he needs people to help keep his head above water, to remind him he's human, not a wrathful shadow haunting gotham. he's more than just the dead robin, the one who came back angry. and even here, two universes separate from his own, he gets stuck in it when he's left alone with his head.
jason doesn't self destruct harder. he lets the response sit for a while, watches several versions of 'fuck you and everything you stand for' scroll across the hud before he ultimately deletes them.
settles instead on some stupid shit an idiot glowstick threw at him that he may or may not have gotten from an anime, jason didn't do any research to back it up, that'd be going way too far. )
nothing is permanent, not even anything back where we originally came from sometimes it's okay to just let things be
no subject
it's what he usually does, when someone throws feelings at him. because attachment is hard. harder still when something goes wrong, everything gets fucked up, and jason's left heartbroken wondering why the fuck he keeps putting himself through this shit. losing roy was a heartbreak, but it was one he pushed for himself. losing artemis and bizzaro was another. losing bruce and the rest of his family at the same time was--enough to break a guy. losing kovacs was oddly hard, because jason's pretty sure their whole thing was just bruising each other up for fun, but he'd gotten attached to that. losing cain was harder. there were so many he watched disappear one by one, up until the point he disappeared and ended up here. he's lost cass and steph already, and he'd just readjusted to steph's wit fucking him up. they'd laughed over putting a tramp stamp on jason, bullied tim.
because jason's an idiot who has forgotten how to keep it all in. to keep to himself, some asshat made him realize that pushing through in dark corners all by himself was fucking him over more than it was helping. he needs people to help keep his head above water, to remind him he's human, not a wrathful shadow haunting gotham. he's more than just the dead robin, the one who came back angry. and even here, two universes separate from his own, he gets stuck in it when he's left alone with his head.
jason doesn't self destruct harder. he lets the response sit for a while, watches several versions of 'fuck you and everything you stand for' scroll across the hud before he ultimately deletes them.
settles instead on some stupid shit an idiot glowstick threw at him that he may or may not have gotten from an anime, jason didn't do any research to back it up, that'd be going way too far. )
nothing is permanent, not even anything back where we originally came from
sometimes it's okay to just let things be